That's the longest workout I have done in four years. You see, I used to love running and biking and swimming. And then I got divorced and I became afraid of going out and accidentally bumping into my ex-husband.
Not afraid because he's a menacing figure, but more afraid that running was his thing, not mine.
But yesterday I took a drive to Rockefeller State Park, mainly because a post by Iamkionda reminded me of how much I love trail running, and partly because I missed the smell of spearmint, the cows grazing and the swans.
Oh, and I missed the sun.
And, a long ninety-minutes later and I had eight miles under my belt. I also had swollen fingers, a dry mouth and a happy heart.
I bet if more people understood how much thinking you can get done on a run, then shoe stores would always be in demand.
I thought about "The One" and I thought about "The Prince" and then I thought a bit about "Renaissance" and "The Actor", but mostly I thought about me.
And I thought about why I prefer to run alone. You see, no one can really get you out there, it's something you have to do for yourself. Just like anything in life, you need to really want it. Your mind can't get in the way. You know, like what I have let the last year of ‘wanting’ or ‘finding’ or whatever do to me. Get in the way.
I remember when I finished the NYC Marathon six years ago. I was about 200 meters from the finish line and a New York City cop said 'congratulations, Marathoner' and I started crying.
No way did I believe I would have run that race a few years ago, yet there I was. Finishing…Medal and all.
I doubt most people who knew me thought I could do this. I wasn't a seasoned runner with years of experience, I was a semi-novice runner with drive. And a body built for distance, not speed. But that's the beauty of running...there is something for everyone.
Like yesterday. My body gave me a good solid few miles and my mind gave me a respite from thinking about things like life and love.
Maybe I'll never get the relationship stuff right when it comes to dating, but I get the rest of life pretty right. Like I was reminded a few years ago: I'm all heart.
Sometimes, that makes up for everything else.
(photo of Ash Loop at Rockefeller State Park, NY)