Sunday, October 5, 2008

Rata-Tatas...An Interview With Two Boobs.

Ladies and gentlemen.I bring to you. My breasts.

I've decided to interview them for this post. Why? Well, throughout the years, they have been fondled, kissed, ogled, pinched and stared at so I figured that they could offer some sound advice on what it's like to be a breast in today's breast-eat-breast world.

Bubbles: Ladies, nice to see you today. I know you've been busy getting ready for election day, so thanks for taking some time out to talk to me.

Tatas: You're welcome, Bubbles. It's nice to actually have someone listen to us.

Bubbles: Tell me, what is the biggest misconception that you've had to overcome in your 20 years of life?

Tatas: That we have ears.

Bubbles: Oh, lol. You two are so funny. Remember that time you...Oh, forget it.

Tatas: :(

Bubbles: So, when was the last time you had something important to do?

Tatas: Well, the other day, we were out shopping and we got to cut in front of this nice gentleman at Stop and Shop.

Bubbles: Whoa! That IS important. Do you know how long the lines are at that store? Now, seriously, if you could tell the other bloggers here any one thing, what would it be?

Tatas: Well, we'd say that it's October and it's time for everyone to remember to 'think pink'!

Bubbles: You are right! And, just a reminder to everyone - having your guy or gal feel you up during sex does not count as a breast exam.

Tatas: Yes, thank you for that. We can't tell you how many times we've thought that.

Bubbles: What else would you like to tell us, since you've got the 'floor' as it were?

Tatas: Well, we just want everyone to remember that they shouldn't buy into the myths about breast cancer. For instance: It is not true that breast cancer only affects older women...From birth to age 39, one woman in 231 will get breast cancer.

Also, just because breast cancer doesn't run in your family - you can't assume you won't be affected. The fact is that 80% of women who get breast cancer had no known familial risk of it.

Breast cancer also affects men! Did you know that approximately 450 men die from breast cancer each year?

But most importantly, we'd like everyone to know that a breast cancer diagnosis is NOT an automatic death sentence. With early diagnosis, many women (and men) go on to live many years after their initial diagnosis and treatment.

Bubbles: Wow! You ladies ARE smart! No wonder people always want to hear you say something!

Tatas: Bubbles, we're breasts....but we're no boobs.


Frogspond said...

Awesome post!!! I will be sending the link around to a few folks as a great reminder to check the "ladies". :-)

Trish said...

Thank you for reminding folks that getting fondled during sex does not count as a breast exam. I also like that you talked about young woman needing to be checked out. My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer at 34 and died at 36. It was in the 80s so chance of survival is much better now. Thank you for your blog and its humor!

Bubblevishious said...

Thanks Frogspond and Trish,

Believe it or not, the other site I blog on is an, er, um, 'adult' oriented site - so the pics I got to post with this piece were quite interesting! ;)